Create your Social Network

Relationships can be a great source of joy and happiness, but they can also be a fundamental cause of your stress.  July is a month that is focused on social awareness.  

 A strong social support network can be critical to help you through the stress of tough times, whether you've had a bad day at work or a year filled with loss or chronic illness. Since your supportive family, friends, and co-workers are such an important part of your life, it's never too soon to cultivate these important relationships.

Numerous studies have demonstrated that having a network of supportive relationships contributes to psychological well-being. When you have a social support network, you benefit in the following ways:

• Sense of belonging. Spending time with people helps ward off loneliness. Whether it's other new parents, dog lovers, fishing buddies or siblings, just knowing you're not alone can go a long way toward coping with stress.
• Increased sense of self-worth. Having people who call you a friend reinforces the idea that you're a good person to be around.
• Feeling of security. Your social network gives you access to information, advice, guidance and other types of assistance should you need them. It's comforting to know that you have people you can turn to in a time of need.

Here are my five top ways to keep your  

relationships healthy:

 1. Keep your expectations realistic:  Healthy relationships mean accepting people for who they are.  Be realistic.  Everyone can disappoint at one time or another.  No one is perfect.  If it is a relationship you want to keep, then keep this in mind.

2. Communication:  this has been said before.  Communicating is one of the most important aspects of keeping your relationships healthy.  Listen, Listen, Listen.  This means with your ears as well as your heart. 

3. Be dependable:  Follow through is very important.  My kids know that I won't often say "I promise......" if I do it will be followed through on.  But come on moms, you know life can get in the way of good intentions.  Better to say "I'll try" if it is going to be iffy.

This way the "promise" doesn't become a disappointment and you will be perceived as more dependable.  This works for all relationships.  If you make a commitment or plans follow through with them. 

4.  Please yourself:  This is sometimes the hardest part.  It is not selfish to want to take care of yourself.  To want something for yourself.  So while saying yes to others, being a good friend, spouse or partner often means being self-less, it is ok to take a  break and do something for you. 

5.  Be Flexible:  Most of us try to keep people and situations just the way we like them to be. It's natural to feel apprehensive, even sad or angry, when people or things change and we're not ready for it. Healthy relationships mean change and growth are allowed!

Other people help make our lives satisfying but they can't create that satisfaction for us. Only you can fill your life. Don't overload on activities this summer.  Pick and choose what will be right for you, what will level of activity will leave you happy, energized and peaceful rather than pressured and stressed.  It takes practice to find your healthy balance, but once you do it feels like, aaahhhhhh.   Enjoy your week, the holiday and your Friends!!!